"Say something, I'm giving up on you."

[shadowedknight]

Who: Benjamin Knight and Asher Rose with Xavier Carlisle
What: The moment of truth
Where: Kindred Council HQ, New York City
When: Thursday night

It was one of those rare moments that Ben was alone and afforded some peace. It didn't happen very often, but that was the name of the game when you were a Kindred Prince of the City. He never really rested in the night time hours, but Kindred rarely did. The day was when they rested, avoiding the hours of daylight and existing at night. It was why the true meaning of the City That Never Sleeps was actually born of a Kindred concept. The humans just believed they invented it. Humans believed they invented many things that were work of Kindred, but that was the very essence of The Masquerade.

Molly had left a little while ago. Ben had been far from content ever since his brother and his Scottish lover had begun acting very peculiarly. In was one thing after another lately, and now Molly's new childer was starting to find his Kindred feet, and with that sparked his true inner Brujah, which basically translated into a defiant pain in the ass. However, he wasn't a bad guy at all. Far from it, in fact. Molly just had to find that healthy balance of Siring a strong-willed Brujah that was now her own blood, and hopefully with no more human casualties because Xavier had borderline frenzied when his Vessel was harmed and he would have been well within his rights to attack Molly for it. Thank fuck Xav was extremely poised and kept his shit together, removing himself from the situation rather than igniting more aggression, although not without very threatening fangs because poised as he was, Ben knew Xav had a really vicious streak when frenzied. He was the eldest in their Council and therefore very powerful. No one needed that bloodshed.

He had just sat down on the leather lounge by the large wall of windows that looked out of the highrise over the City when the doorbell rang. Ben's apartment was the penthouse of the Knightshead Liquor corporations building, and acted as the Kindred Council HQ. He made the mistake of believing he had a few moments of tranquillity, but no one who didn't have authorisation to get to the penthouse could get to the doorbell without making it through strict security checks and protocols, so whoever it was had reason to be there. He got up with a shake of his and went to answer the door, but he couldn't have anticipated what the fuck would be there when he did.

There was Asher Rose, Toreador without a fucking doubt because he was immaculate, and in his arms was an unfamiliar guy, unconscious with his head resting against Asher's chest. Just behind them, Xavier was standing, giving Ben a piercing gaze, but his face was unreadable. The worst part was, though, that Asher was dripping in both Logan and Eric's scent. Ben knew that that shit was about to hit the proverbial fan and there would be no peace for him that night. He just stepped aside and wordlessly gestured them inside with his hand. "Who is the mortal?" he asked right off the bat.

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[shadowedknight]

Ben's eyes narrowed slightly, them not leaving Asher as Xavier ushered them inside. There was a lot of distress emanating off him. Ben hadn't been able to fit any of these pieces together once Xavier had told him that Asher wasn't dead, but Toreador and that the young mortal in the hospital with unexplained blood loss had been Asher's lover. Now some of the pieces snapped together when Xavier told him the name of the young man nursed in Asher's arms. Brodie Bradford was the name of the patient in the hospital Ben had received information of from his sources working at the facility. They went over to the sprawling lounge suit and Xavier took the end seat and once Asher sat too, Ben sat directly in front of him on the glass coffee table. He didn't want to intimate the childer, but he needed to be as close to him as he could be to read him as accurately as he could.

"This young man, he is dying," he told Asher quietly with a nod at Brodie still held in his arms. "Is that why you have employed Xavier's council? To request Embrace of your soul mate?" The sickness from Brodie was overwhelming, but a childer may not realise exactly what that sensation was. Ben was a Prince, and he had no intentions of pussy-footing with any Kindred. It was why he was in the position he was to start with. But he could be firm as well as being kind. Asher had to know he could be trusted. "Or did you try and fail because you could not tolerate his blood?"

[abeautifulnightmare]

Asher had been looking down at Brodie, but when the Prince started to talk, he had looked up and met his gaze. Now the questions were hanging in the air, and all Asher could do was stare back at him. How did he know Brodie was dying just from looking at him... or being in his presence? Asher couldn't feel it, he had only known when he had fed from Brodie and the blood was tainted. "No, sir," he began quietly. "I just want to be able to give him the option. But I don't want to be the one to do it. That's why I called Xavier. I won't take him against his will. I don't want him awakening with the same torment I've been trying so hard to escape myself. I can't do it that to him. I won't," he vowed in a tight and sharp whisper, his hold on Brodie tightening.

His gaze averted back down to Brodie, and he dipped his head, pressing a linger kiss to his forehead. There was a tear of blood that tracked down Asher's cheek and dropped softly onto Brodie's temple. Asher just wiped it away with his thumb when the garish thick liquid marred Brodie's pale skin. "I can't lose him again. He he dies, I want to end myself. No one interfering this time. I will not live without him."

[shadowedknight]

At this, Ben glanced at Xavier, who still had an epic case of poised poker face going on. Were they alone, they would have discussed this further but it was true that Xavier was here to represent a member of his Clan, and in this instance, his priority would be Asher, especially considering he was a childer seeking guidance. Xavier also wasn't someone who would downplay the issue of soul mates. At all. In the mortal world, many didn't believe in it because it meant something different to when you were Kindred. If your soul was tethered to another, it was hard to deny the link to them. You could, but it would be difficult as long as they were in your presence. In this case, Asher clearly didn't want to let go of this guy and there had to be a whole lot of history here Ben wanted to know, but he knew he had to be patient. The pressing matters at hand were more important.

Like the fact Asher was blatantly confirming without even being prompted that he had been taken against his will. Ben didn't want to get ahead of himself here, but he was finding himself extremely nervy to discover all these answers and where it would all end up. "Have you rendered Brodie unconscious, Asher? You must tell me if you have attempted to feed from him. If he needs mortal medical assistance, I can call for a doctor. We have many Kindred doctors who treat mortals. They are some of the top physicians in their fields. Do you know what it is he is dying from?"

[abeautifulnightmare]

"I frightened him. I... I panicked. I keep doing that around him. I'm losing my mind. I feel like I've been losing it ever since all this happened." Asher just didn't know what 'all this' was anymore. Was he meaning how everything crashed and burned with Brodie, their relationship ending for his stupid errors and fucking up the most amazing thing to ever happen to him? He didn't know what he meant, he just knew that Brodie was dying, and he was nursing him in his arms like he could break at any moment. "But I didn't mean to do it. I haven't fed from him beyond that one time, and I was in a frenzy. I don't remember a lot about it. I just... his scent was all over him and I lost it. I didn't even know where to find him until then..."

He trailed off, looking down at Brodie again. "I just think he is ill. I think he does need a doctor. I don't know what he's dying from. We haven't spoken, I never knew if I wanted to approach him. I could sense him here in the city and I have been searching for him. Searching so, so much. I never meant to harm him. I never wanted to hurt him or to lose him. I couldn't go on without him. I tried to get him back, but he didn't want that. It was like I couldn't breathe," he tried to explain, looking at the Prince imploringly, hoping like hell he would get it.

[shadowedknight]

Ben snapped his fingers and gestured for one of his ever-present and extensively trusted staff over. Staff that knew they would face death if they ever betrayed his trust. It was part of what made them so loyal. They were both Kindred and mortal, most of the humans willing to act as Vessels. He requested one of their trusted doctors in the City to be brought here as a matter of urgency to attend to Brodie and fetch him what he needed to recuperate. Once they were gone, he resumed his place perched on the coffee table. "Asher, who is your Sire?" he asked him directly. "Please bear in mind that I will know if you are being untruthful. Being taken against your will is one of the most serious crimes a Kindred can commit and as the Prince of this City, it is my duty to address these instance at my discretion, or perhaps delegate the responsibility to my Primogen of the Clan responsible."

He reached over, holding his hand up so Asher could see he wasn't going to harm Brodie. He was already in an extremely volatile state, for someone to touch his soul mate without warning would likely trigger instance frenzy. He gently pressed his fingers to Brodie's throat to check his pulse, looking at his watch to see the regularity of the heartbeat. It was steady, but Brodie's skin was clammy to the touch, like he had a distinct fever.

[abeautifulnightmare]

Asher had no intentions of lying. He understood the Kindred hierarchy and he wouldn't disrespect the Prince by constructing falsities to throw at him. He was so drained and weak that he couldn't fight anymore. He had been fighting ever since he was Embraced, trying to fight what he was, loathing it and loathing himself, not wanting to live yet still desperately searching for Brodie but not knowing why. He had a constant battle of whether to approach Brodie if he found him or not, whether to tell him everything. He had always erred on the safe side, cowering away from the thought of dragging Brodie into this hellish world he had been rudely thrust without warning. But that all changed when he realised Brodie was dying. His Brodie, his amazing, sweet and beautiful soul mate. It wasn't fair.

He looked up at Ben, eyes slowly ascending up to his. "Logan Buchanan," he finally revealed flatly. "But only because I wasn't for the Ventrue bloodline." The words hung in the air heavily and silence reigned over a tension between all of them. Asher had been threatened to do this all along, to thrust Logan and Eric into the firing line for what they did to him. But this wasn't about that anymore. This was about Asher having no idea what he should do next, lost in a world he had been pulled into and was a lost soul ever since.

[shadowedknight]

A string of harsh cussing fell from Ben's lips when that confirmation finally came, and he got up to storm over to the window, looking out on the views of the city at night. He often did a lot of his deep contemplation there. It was a peaceful image for him. But this time, he had his hand up to his mouth to try and quell the anger and betrayal he was feeling. Suddenly everything in the recent months with his brother made pristine sense. If Eric had been here, Ben might have been at risk of attacking him just for his sheer stupidity. He was the brother of the Prince of the City! He couldn't just go around ordering Embraces, and especially not on people as high profile as Asher Rose! Asher's work was known all over the world. He was the modern day Gucci or Versace, his work would be timeless just from his rapid exposure and talent running like wildfire through the fashion world... a world that was extremely prosperous in New York alone. What the hell had Eric been thinking? But more importantly... why Asher?

It took some time for him to calm himself down. He had to keep a controlled mind here and not let his hurt from his brother's betrayal overtake everything. Asher was in distress and if Ben proved unwilling to assist, Xavier would step in and Xav had a very old and traditional way of ruling. He may demand both Eric and Logan be destroyed, simply for the fact one of his Clan had been taken against his will. And if Logan was destroyed, Ealasaid could well ignite an international Kindred rebellion for one of her childers being destroyed. It was so fucking messy, and Ben had no idea as yet what to do. He went back over to Asher, and sat down again. "You must tell me what happened."

[abeautifulnightmare]

If there was one thing Asher was relieved for right now, it was the fact Kindred strength was a lot more than human because he couldn't let go of Brodie right now. His arms wouldn't hurt, and that was a plus for him. He didn't know why Brodie wasn't waking up, and he knew that this time, him losing control wasn't to blame. Not directly, at least. He knew he had scared Brodie beyond belief back in Charleston. He had never, ever seen Brodie so terrified and he felt awful for that. He felt awful that lately, he didn't seem to have much control over anything when usually that was one of his most prized traits. He hated himself, he hated this world, and couldn't tolerate thinking about being here for centuries if Brodie couldn't be with him.

"I..." he began, but tapping into these parts of him was painful. There wasn't a single person he had discussed any of this with. He had kept it all inside, fighting Eric and Logan to keep them away and not access the pain inside. He resented them, and he hated what they did to him. That was what made it so hard to trust them to Sire him. "I wanted to kill myself. I destroyed my relationship with Brodie because I let everything else in my life take over and drown him out. I didn't even realise what I was doing because I was so wrapped up in everything. But I didn't want to live. That night, I tried one last time to call him and to try to fix everything I ruined, but I would only ever get his voicemail. Then that one time, it was just too much. I didn't want to keep living. I was at a party, and I think Eric and Logan were there. I don't know, I have never wanted to talk to them about it. I hated them for it. But I left, and I couldn't stop all the terrible feelings and thoughts. I wanted to end it, so I stepped out in front of a speeding car. That was supposed to be the end. But then I woke up."

[shadowedknight]

"You have received no guidance from a Sire?" Ben asked. That was serious in itself. Somewhat like the equivalent of letting a child loose with a loaded gun. Though Asher was extensively poised, despite the obvious distress over his lover in his arms. Ben threw Xavier another brief glance, knowing that Toreadors could be one of the most human of Clans as to their emotions. Did they have a case here of Asher bringing a lot of those traumatic human emotions with him over into the Kindred world? Childers taken against their will were often confused and lost as Kindred, defiant, fighting their natural animalistic instincts. But couple that with emotions such as depression, rejection, wanting to die, it could be a deadly mix.

He gestured to Xavier. "Xavier is your Primogen. Despite who anyone's Sire is, the Primogen is always there for guidance. You can trust him, he will protect you and he will protect your lover. He is mated to his own soul mate, he understands the depth of that connection, and how it can make one feel crazy with confusion and grief of not having them near. You are safe here, of that I guarantee. But out there, on your own, without guidance, you can harm yourself and harm others. Do you still have wish to harm yourself, Asher?"

[abeautifulnightmare]

"Some," Asher relented quietly and he looked over at Xavier, almost seeking guidance right now. He was feeling trapped and intimidated, but at the same time, he knew he needed help. He couldn't keep fighting all this off because Brodie needed him. He just didn't know how to handle showing someone who was still human what all this was, trying to make them understand. Especially considering the fact Brodie had been terrified to see him. Asher could still hear his ear-piercing scream in that cemetery and see the absolute fear all over his face before he passed out. "Logan and Eric both tried. I just didn't want them near me. You don't understand, I didn't want any of this. I wanted to die. I hate this. I hate what I am. I hate feeding, I hate existing."

He paused and then took a small antique pistol from the inner breast pocket of his jacket, still nursing Brodie protectively. He put the weapon in Ben's hands. "The only thing that has stopped me ending it is Brodie. There was this... sensation of him. Like I needed to have him, consume him, have him consume me. It was constantly thrumming away inside me and it was just getting stronger and stronger. I didn't want Eric and Logan near me after the initial first days. I wanted to rip them apart every time they were near me."